I JUST KIDNAPPED THIS MESSAGEBOARD!

Jimmy · Post by **Jimmy** » August 3, 2005, 12:55 am

I'm holding it for ransom!

If you ever want to see this messageboard alive, I want 3 submarine sammiches...no...FIVE submarine sammiches with mayonnaise, turkey, roast beef, tomatoes, and lettuce! I swear if you put onions on it I will mess up this messageboard's face by punching it really hard! WITH MY FIST!

In the time that it took you to read this message, I just forced your preciious messageboard to drink flat soda--THE CARBONATION WAS GONE! Think about that for a while. Yeah, this is no joke.

And you may not have noticed, but I changed my avatar to show how serious I am. No, it's not the same. You can see that my face is less happy than before. LOOK HOW INTIMIDATING I AM!

This is not the face of an angel! I'm a gangsta now. Give me what I want and nobody gets hurt!

Your friend,

Jimmy

Post by **Paco103** » August 3, 2005, 10:43 am

OH NO!!! There is no way I can afford that Ransom, and the government refuses to negotiate with terrorists so I guess all hope is lost. Please Jimmy, let's make a deal. I don't want to lose my message board. It's all I have in the world. Well, aside from everything else that I care about more - but still, you see where I'm going with this. Let's work something out! Please don't harm her, and no more making her drink flat soda. That is CRUEL and UNUSUAL torture (unless it's rootbeer, then it makes a good sassifrass tea).

HatePirate · Post by **HatePirate** » August 3, 2005, 2:03 pm

Jimmy...you sick, sick bastard. I'm gonna hunt you down for this. And when I catch you I'm gonna CARVE OUT YOUR BACK WITH AN ICEPICK!!! Then I'm going to back the wound with...ONIONS! And when your crying and begging for mercy, I'll play it nice. I'll act like we're even, and I'll even treat you to one of those sub sandwiches you wanted so bad. IT WILL BE TRACED WITH RAT POISON! YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE!

So save yourself hours of pain and hand over the message board now!

Jimmy · Post by **Jimmy** » August 3, 2005, 3:21 pm

Hey! Your dumb messageboard keeps eating all my cheetos! Plus, when I tell him to wash his hands before dinner, HE DOESN'T LISTEN! All he wants to do is watch Sponge Bob all day.

That's it, you can have him back!

Your friend,

Jimmy

Post by **Paco103** » August 3, 2005, 7:46 pm

He he he - good ol' bearnotes. I never could make him stop reading "The Ransom of Red Chief" over and over and over again. But I guess it's not so bad, seems he learned something from it!

HatePirate · Post by **HatePirate** » August 3, 2005, 10:29 pm

I'm glad to see your little charade is over, Jimmy. For a minute there I thought I was gonna have to bust a cap in your punk ass.

"Obie Trice, real name no gimmicks"

Celtic Samurai · Post by **Celtic Samurai** » August 23, 2005, 5:59 pm

When "keeping it real" goes wrong . . .