23. Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
22. Don't tell me you forgot to bring the anatomy book!
21. Someone call the janitor! We're going to need a mop!
20. Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie..
19. Oh no! I just lost my contact.
18. Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing off my concentration!
17. Hmmm.. I never knew that thing was in there...
16. What's this doing here?
15. What do you mean you want a divorce?
14. I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
13. That's cool! Now can you make her leg twitch?!
12. Rats, there go the lights again...
11. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
10. You fool! You got the arms and legs switched.
9. Well, folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
8. Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
7. OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
6. Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
5. Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
4. Rats! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
3. FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!
2. Ah, well.. I never really did like this guy too much...
and last but not least...
1. "Pass the scalpel" . . . "Sure! Here you go, Dr. Kevorkian!"
Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery
Moderator: solid_dave
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Fried Squirrel
- Bear Leader
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Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery
O'NEILL: "Ring the perimeter with C4." REYNOLDS: "Not much faith in plan A?"O'NEILL: "Since when has plan A ever worked?" REYNOLDS: "Right." (evolution part1)
i wouldn't want to hear ANY of those during surgery, just for the fact that if i heard them, it would mean the anestesiologist had f'd up and i was still conscious and could probably still feel everything going on.
which, oddly enough, is a big fear of mine. haha
which, oddly enough, is a big fear of mine. haha
If I could I would shrink myself and sink through your skin to your blood cells and remove whatever makes you hurt but I am too weak to be your cure.
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Paco103
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Well there are some surgery's that you HAVE to stay awake for. I think certain kinds of brain surgery are like that. . . which would just be really weird - but I think they still knock off your nervous system. There's some shot I got once that removes ALL feeling, it's freakin' awesome - but it hurt like HE!! to get that shot!
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tiffybird24
- Princess
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After my mom had my little sister they had to do sergery to fix her hernia that she had developed during the pregnancy. She has a fear of going completely to sleep and not know what was going on so they did something to where she was awake for the surgery. In the middle of the surgery the doctor goes, "oh sh*t, I didn't realize it was that big." Thats when the nurse said, "uh doctor, she's awake."
My wife was awake during her caesarian, which is normal. They draped a curtain to block her view, but when our daughter was removed my wife felt a tiny foot leave her ribcage. In a morbid way, I'm proud to say our daughter is strong. When she kicked in the womb, she cracked a floating rib. 
Things not to say when your wife is undergoing a caesarian:
"Hey Doc, you mind if I leave my initials in there?"
Things not to say when your wife is undergoing a caesarian:
"Hey Doc, you mind if I leave my initials in there?"
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tiffybird24
- Princess
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- Location: la la land
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Re: Things You Don't Want To Hear During Surgery
Fried Squirrel wrote:23. Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.
22. Don't tell me you forgot to bring the anatomy book!
21. Someone call the janitor! We're going to need a mop!
20. Hand me that...uh...that uh.....thingie..
19. Oh no! I just lost my contact.
18. Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing off my concentration!
17. Hmmm.. I never knew that thing was in there...
16. What's this doing here?
15. What do you mean you want a divorce?
14. I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.
13. That's cool! Now can you make her leg twitch?!
12. Rats, there go the lights again...
11. Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
10. You fool! You got the arms and legs switched.
9. Well, folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
8. Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
7. OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
6. Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
5. Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.
4. Rats! Page 47 of the manual is missing!
3. FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!
2. Ah, well.. I never really did like this guy too much...
and last but not least...
1. "Pass the scalpel" . . . "Sure! Here you go, Dr. Kevorkian!"
hahahaha i can realate to this cuz my dad's a doctor.Please more jokes like this in the future if you can find them lol
A man goes to a psychiatrist, and tells him "Doc, I think I have an obsession with sex." The doctor agrees to examine him and begins by showing him various drawings. First the doctor draws a square and asks the man to identify it. The man immediate ly says "sex". Next the doctor draws a circle, which the man again identifies as sex. Thirdly, the doctor draws a triangle, which of course the patient identifies as "sex". The doctor puts the drawings away and says to the patient, "Yes, I do believe t hat you have an obsession with sex." To which the man replies, "I'm not the one with the obsession! YOU'RE the one drawing all the dirty pictures!"